"Stacey, you have fat ankles"

With the New year upon us, many people have made New Year's Resolutions. I am not one of those people. I find as soon as you start making lists and verbalizing these grand plans, you set yourself up to fail. I find it is better to just DO without making a big TA-DO!

At the top of many resolution lists is losing weight. It makes me sad that this is such an ongoing, all-consuming issue for so many people. I was thinking of my own personal weight history and I have to say, the pressure to be thin has been weighing me down for many, many years. When I was in high school I weighed 117 lbs. I thought I was fat. In my 20's I weighed 125 lbs. I thought I was fat. In my 30's I weighed 130 lbs and yes, I thought I was fat. What is wrong with this picture? It is heartbreaking that even when I was fit as a fiddle, I still didn't feel like I was good enough or thin enough.

In my 20's I was at my peak. I was a gym rat who worked out 3 hours a night, 6 days a week and I looked gooood (though as I said, didn't see it at the time). It was during this time that I was told I was “thick” and that I had “fat ankles”. The fact that I can still recall exactly when and where I was told this says a lot. It says that, unfortunately, it is human nature to hang onto the insults and bad things that are said about us as opposed to compliments and good things.

I happen to LIKE my ankles! 

Let's face it, you don't know what someone's personal struggle with weight is about. It can be genetic, it can be medication related, it can be illness related. For those who are abused, eating can be a form of comfort. For those who are insecure or have low self-confidence, it can be a way to “hide”. Those off the cuff comments can stick with someone for a very long time and cause a huge amount of unseen damage.

So, without making this a “resolution”, let's start 2012 by treating each other (and ourselves) with kindness, respect and above all, understanding. Pay those close to you meaningful compliments. Hell, throw one out to a complete stranger! Make it a personal goal to pay one person a compliment a day. Uttering a few kind words won't only make someone else feel good, it will make YOU feel good too.

And lastly, let's start remembering the nice things people say to us and screw the insults. Who needs 'em!

“We're beautiful. No matter what they say. Words won't bring us down.”--Christina Aguilera.

You know you love me,

Stacey xo